


Breaking the Rules

by JudasComplex



Series: Reformation [1]
Category: Persona 4
Genre: Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Gen, I apologize in advance for any Adachi feels you may have, at least for a little, the team is really in it peripherally
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-04-08
Packaged: 2018-03-21 21:52:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3705737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JudasComplex/pseuds/JudasComplex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn't care about any of the victims. But when the wrong member of a family gets put on the Midnight Channel, Adachi finds he's not as completely separate from this as he thought. This is breaking the rules of his game.  Adachi POV. (Takes place mid-game, the events surrounding Heaven, and is Adachi-centric, so consider appropriate spoilers. Rating for Adachi's filthy mouth.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breaking the Rules

It all would have been fucking perfect if it had just stayed the way it started.

I didn't give a shit about any of them. Yamano was a cheating whore, and Konishi was a hot piece of jailbait and nothing else. After them, I didn't care who Namatame threw in. I'd just wait for the rain to come, make some popcorn, and sit down and watch the only show worth my time in this dust speck of a town.

It was hysterical. Watching kids acts like complete dumbasses on the Midnight Channel, and then poof! Nowhere to be seen. I'd thought the Amagi chick was a bad enough cocktease, but when the idol girl showed up... _That_ was a show.

And yeah, when the bodies stopped showing and Dojima kept busting everyone's ass for leads on something, anything, I got suspicious. Dojima didn't actually expect much from me, so if I wandered off and said I was looking for leads, he barely looked twice. So I found them, once they came back. All with the same generic story...and all friends with Narukami after.

Yu fucking Narukami. You couldn't pay people to make friends the way he did. I didn't get that kid, but he was friendly to my face when he ran into me at Junes, or when I followed Dojima home from work...and then screwing my plan over with his little friends when he thought I wasn't looking. He wasn't expecting me to be looking. I was just Adachi-san, that idiot detective who never knew when to shut up.

I could almost appreciate how two-faced the dumbass kid was. But I could still see through him.

So I warned him. Went out on a limb and stuck a letter in the mailbox as I walked past one morning. Planned to do it again when he didn't fucking stop. Tried to make that one more threatening, targeting someone he cared about. It'd be the perfect excuse to get rid of Dojima, anyway. He was too damn close to the truth for comfort. Ryotaro Dojima was a hard-nosed prick with a stick up his ass so far I could see it in his mouth, but he wasn't stupid. And he needed to go.

I was confident that with all the mess about the cops on the news, Dojima was next in line. No one else had been talked about except that one politician or whatever who talked to the elementary school, but he was already back in the city by now. I was finally going to see what Dojima hid deep down inside...oh, and I was going to enjoy finding his dead body dangling from a rooftop.

I was positive. It was going to be him. I had my popcorn and the soundtrack of rain hitting my window, and the _tick-tick-tick_ of the clock counting down to show time. What was Dojima going to show off? _For fuck's sake, don't try to be sexy._ What a buzzkill. _I don't think Dojima could be sexy if he put his mind to it. Probably safe._

 _Tick-tick-TICK._ Twelve. The grin spread across my lips and I took a piece of popcorn and tossed it to my mouth.

It bounced off my chin and onto the couch. _No. No no no, this is **not**..._

The bowl got shoved aside and I moved closer to the television, staring at the figure. It can't be. This... But the screen was too blurry. It was just a silhouette, impossible to tell size or sex. _It'll be him. I'll leave the note in the mailbox before I head to work tomorrow morning. This will all go perfectly according to plan._

\---

What was not part of my plan was Dojima himself getting my letter, and dragging Narukami into the station for interrogation. _Honestly? He thinks this goody-two-shoes is involved with this? Trust me, Dojima, if you knew..._ But I stood there, looking as dopey as I could manage, and cursed my luck. There was no way Namatame could get Dojima if he was in here with me. And while Konishi had fit in the interrogation room TV just fine, Dojima was bigger and heavier.

Then there was Narukami. That would be...a challenge.

But the kid just sat there, spilling everything about the other world to Dojima. Personas and Shadows and the whole thing. Amazing. Kid could keep a secret from the world, but as soon as he felt threatened, he buckled. ...I'd have to remember that.

Dojima didn't believe him. Obviously. I mean, the kid sounded like a nutcase. He sat there being all sad and poor-pitiful-me, because his darling little nephew didn't _trust_ him, and why wouldn't he just _be honest_ with him, and I stood silently, trying not to gag. 

And then Dojima stormed past, leaving the kid in interrogation with me.

I played my part, oblivious to the TV world and his Persona. Told him he'd be safe here with the cops, that Dojima was playing the father and keeping him safe. Gave him a hint about looking at the first two cases. If he wanted to keep playing detective and ignore my warning, he'd have the opportunity. It'd just be one more mouse for me to catch, and I was one hell of a cat. Maybe he'd bring all this friends, and I could finally finish them all off.

I told him I'd be right outside if he needed anything, and then walked out. I wasn't going to play babysitter to Dojima's nephew all night. Besides, if I was going to catch the Midnight Channel, I wasn't doing it around the kid. I didn't trust myself to hide my emotions when I saw the bastard on the screen.

Just before midnight, I told Dojima I was taking a leak, and slipped down to the break room. There was a TV there I could watch, and I could get back quickly after I saw the show the asshole had in store. 

_Tick...tick...TICK._

I turned to the TV, heart pounding. This was it. This was finally the moment. I didn't know how it would happen, but I knew at long last, when Ryotaro Dojima stepped out for a smoke or whatever, his life was never going to—

My head spun as the picture flickered to life. My breath caught in my throat, and my heart jumped into my mouth. “No...” I stumbled back a step, then darted forward to peer at the screen.

Small slender body, clearly shorter than all the others. I could just make out the pigtails her hair was in. A grade school girl. _It can't be._ I looked down and saw the evening paper sitting on the table, opened and abandoned by whoever had been reading it. A grade schooler's picture. A smiling little girl.

_...had spoken to a student unnamed on the news, but easily definable as the effervescent Nanako Dojima, daughter of the well-known and respected detective heading the Inaba Police Department during these difficult cases..._

“Nanako-chan...” My voice was barely a whisper. _No, no, no!_ It was the wrong person. The wrong member of the family. There was no reason—no reason! I hated her father, yes. But she'd been nothing but kind to me, no matter what I said or how I acted. Nothing wavered her resolve.

She was one of the only decent people I'd ever known.

_And she's home alone right now._

I couldn't leave. That would be magnitudes of suspicious that I couldn't afford. By the time I looked back to the screen, the picture was gone and I was left in the black break room again. _I don't know what to do._ For the first time, my game wasn't as fun anymore. I didn't give a shit about anyone else who'd ended up on that fucking thing, but this...

I don't know how I managed to get back to the door at interrogation, but it was clear I'd ben gone too long. “Hell of a piss, Adachi,” Dojima grumbled as I took my place again?

“Wh-what? Oh, yeah. Sorry. Stomach troubles. Whoo, serves me right for ordering extra-hot at Aiya!”

“Dumbass,” was the muttered response. I ignored it as I slid to sit in the chair next to the door.

Nanako-chan... _Maybe Namatame won't do it, since she's just a kid. Maybe...maybe she won't answer the door. Maybe..._ I came up with a thousand ways that this wasn't going to happen. That something had gone wrong. That nothing was going to happen.

And that was when it all caved in.

Hanamura, Tatsumi, and the weird blonde kid who followed them around busted in, babbling about having to talk to Narukami, ignoring Dojima's protests, and rushing past me. Somehow, I followed as Dojima went in after them.

It was Hanamura who dropped the bomb. “Nanako-chan's missing!”

Whatever happened next, I don't remember it well. I know Dojima flipped out. Talked to Shirogane on the phone. Sounded more heart-broken than I thought the man was capable of. For a split second, I actually felt bad for him. His wife dead, and now his daughter gone... And that second part was all my—

No.

This wasn't my fault.

I didn't do anything.

Namatame did this. I was an innocent. I just gave him the idea. I hadn't killed anyone.

_Nanako-chan..._

Dojima was calling everyone we had, trying to catch whoever had stolen Nanako. My voice was eerily calm. “Even if you tell 'em this is connected to the murders, we can't prove it. And everyone on the force thinks this case is over and done with.” There was no way to catch him. He'd never be able to catch him, and if he did, Nanako would be long gone.

He ignored me, walking toward the door. “Wh-where are you going!?”

I didn't recognize his eyes when he looked at me. Dojima didn't show emotions other than anger and frustration. But now... Now I saw pain. Desperation. Weakness. They didn't look like Dojima's eyes. And when he spoke, his voice was shattered in all the wrong places. “I'm gonna go look for my daughter! If this is connected to that murder case, the top brass won't accept the facts until it's too late. I'm not gonna wait for those clowns.”

My mind raced. I didn't know what I was trying to accomplish by stopping him. Maybe some piece of me was trying to protect him, as pathetic as that would be. Something didn't want to see him chasing after something I knew he couldn't catch. The Dojima I worked with was cool, collected, and didn't fly off the handle like this. I didn't know what he was capable of like this.

“But do you even have any ideas or leads on who took her!? If they used a car, there's no way—” I couldn't finish my sentence before he cut me off.

“Shut up! That's why I'm hurrying!”

And he was gone.

I didn't know what to do. This wasn't the way the game went. I wasn't supposed to give a shit. All of these people were worthless and they were better off dead and at least it made this nowhere of a town tolerable to be in. This was exciting, right? This was way more action than any of the other murders had gotten! 

This was supposed to be fun. I didn't give a shit.

I didn't give a shit.

I _didn't. Give. A. Shit._

Maybe if I said it enough, I'd believe myself.

The kids wanted Narukami to leave, so they could look for Nanako-chan. I said I couldn't do that. The rest of the Scooby Doo crew showed up. I tried to look panicked. I don't think I had to fake much. Shirogane started babbling about the TV world, supposedly filling me on the details. I wasn't hearing words, not the ones the tiny faux detective was saying or the ones I seemed to be saying. They managed to get enough clues to point them to Namatame, and distantly I was almost impressed.

Hearing my name finally jarred me back to the present. Shirogane was staring at me. “Adachi-san! Is there anyone who fits this profile!?”

I tried to recall what they'd come up with, and all I could remember was me saying something and Dojima, and a delivery truck. _Hell, that's enough._

“A profile formed by a bunch of kids talking it over...? Let's see... A delivery company, huh?” I made my way to the desk, where Dojima had helpfully left a bunch of papers regarding the case, specifically from early on.

I could point them in Namatame's direction. I didn't know what it would do...but it couldn't screw up the game anymore than it was now. Anything I didn't see... I couldn't talk about. I left before the kids all “escaped” from police custody.

\---

I honestly don't remember much of what happened after that. I remember Dojima's accident. I remember the kids finding the truck and the TV. I remember riding in the back of the ambulance with Dojima as he went to the hospital. _“Where's Nanako...?”_ His question kept ringing in my ears.

_I know where she is, Dojima. But you wouldn't believe me if I told you._

I was lost between work and the hospital. I didn't know how long it had been. Days? Weeks? I didn't go home; I slept at the office...or at least, tried to sleep. Most nights I just lay awake, staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out where it had all gone wrong.

I felt absolutely no guilt about any of the other incidents. None of them mattered. It was just something to keep me interested in my boring ass assignment.

So why couldn't I breathe now?

“Adachi-san?” I lifted my head off my desk as one of the officers addressed me. “Sorry, did I...um, am I interrupting you?”

“No.” I blinked, too slowly. “What?”

“It's just...well, you're Dojima-san's partner, and since he's in the hospital...well, are you headed there later?”

“Probably? What do you want? Spit it out.”

“It's about his daughter.”

My mind clicked into high alert, and I was on my feet before I knew I'd moved. “Nanako-chan? What about her? Did they find her?”

“We just got the call from Shirogane. I guess they found her, and Namatame. They're both on their way to Inaba Municipal right now. I guess...” The officer hesitated, looking away.

I took a few steps forward, grabbing the man by his jacket lapels and giving him a brief shake. “You guess? You guess what!? Say something!” 

The officer's face went white. “I guess Dojima-san's daughter is in pretty bad condition. Not sure what the problem is yet, but it didn't sound good.”

_Bad condition. Didn't sound good. Nanako-chan, don't you dare die on me..._

I dropped my grip on the man's jacket and tore off for the door, forgetting my own jacket in the process. It didn't matter. I wouldn't need it.

\---

Dojima had already heard by the time I got there. Nanako-chan and Namatame both were in the hospital, and no one could figure out anything. They were running tests, but nothing was certain. Namatame wasn't talking, much to my absolutely not-surprise. 

After a cursory “thanks for coming, Adachi; go get some sleep” from Dojima, I wandered my way down past Nanako's room...only to come face to face with the teen avengers again. “Huh? You guys still here?” If I could pride myself on nothing else, it was my ability to throw up that idiot facade in an instant. Nothing was wrong. Just stupid ol' Adachi, taking a walk in the hospital.

They asked me if we'd found anything out. I parroted back what the doctors had told me. “Who knows when we'll be able to hear his story...” I looked to the floor. They were all watching me. Why were they all watching me?

“Well, it's getting late,” I heard myself saying. “So hurry home. The last thing we need is for you guys to collapse too.” Yes. Concerned for their safety. Dojima cared about these brats. They'd found his daughter. Need to take care of themselves.

Narukami's eyes were on mine the second I looked up. I don't know what he was looking for, but I couldn't help but feel that he could see too much. Dammit, I hated that kid.

So I walked away, without saying another word. Walked past all of them, feeling their eyes on me as I went, and ignoring them all. I didn't have anything to say to them. I didn't have anything to say to anyone.

…

Though I still ended up pulling rank to get into the hospital late that night. No one cared; there had been Inaba police coming in and out all day so far. For all the hospital knew, I was on duty watching Namatame. And I thought about going to him. Figuring out what was going on in his head. Beating him senseless until he explained why he'd threatened Nanako-chan.

Asked him what had happened that made me break like this.

Nanako's room was silent, save for the soft beeping of the heart monitor and the breath-like puffs of the oxygen machine helping her breathe. She looked so small there in the hospital bed, all tubes and cords, mask over her mouth still a shade too big for someone of her frame. I sank into the chair that had been pulled up next to her bed, probably for Narukami or one of his friends, and tried to make my hands stop shaking. Tried to make the knots in my stomach go away. Tried to somehow make myself believe that this wasn't my fault, _this wasn't my fault, **I didn't do this...**_

“I'm so sorry, Nanako-chan.” I hated how broken my voice sounded. I was hoarse and squeakier than a preteen boy. But I ignored it. Ignored the tears in my eyes—running down my cheeks—dripping onto my shirt, my pants, wherever they fell. Ignored it all except for that tiny sleeping face. “I'm so damn sorry. It wasn't...I didn't...” I swallowed, forcing the lump in my throat to shift. “You were never supposed to get hurt. And I don't know why I care so much about this one thing and not anything else, but I do and I hate it and I just really want you to get better.”

 _So that the game can continue without me having this on my hands._ My stomach twisted. I told myself it was because I was sick of all this emotional crap.

It wasn't because I felt guilty. Don't be absurd.

Nanako stirred, and my heart stopped. What would I say if she woke up? Would she panic if she saw me at her bedside? She wouldn't be expecting to see me. I stood, trying to slip away before I scared her.

“A-da...chi-san?” Whatever resolve I had left shattered at the sound of that stricken voice. She could barely speak.

I turned back, taking the seat again. “Hey, Nanako-chan. Did I wake you up? I'm sorry.” I desperately tried to make my voice sound anything close to normal.

“Mm-mm.” Her head just barely managed to shake no. “I h-heard y...ou. In m...y dream.”

This vice in my chest could really let go any time now, and that would be fine by me. “In your dream? Uh oh, I hope I was being nice!” I had my facade. It's all I had. I needed that facade. She couldn't see beyond it. I couldn't let her.

She gave me a faint smile, and my heart ripped in two. “You...were. You wan...ted me to... get...better. You...soun...ded sad.”

I coughed, yes definitely coughed, it wasn't hiding anything else like a _sob_ or something, no that's ridiculous and false. “Well, that's true. I do want you to get better. Me, and your dad, and your big bro...” What a stupid thing to call him. “All of his friends, too. Everyone wants you to get better. So rest up and feel better soon, okay?”

“...kay.” Her eyes fluttered shut as I stood up.

“Hey Nanako-chan?” My voice was barely making it over a whisper now.

“Mm?”

“Let's not tell anyone I came to see you, okay? It can be our little secret. Your dad might get mad at me for bothering you this late at night.”

“Kay.” That faint little smile came back, and I swallowed hard again. “Tha...nk you, A...dachi...san.”

“Sleep well, Nanako-chan.” I brushed her bangs away from her face and, for reasons I still don't know, set a brush of a kiss to her forehead.

She was asleep before I left the room. With my vision blurring, I hightailed it back to my apartment.

I was going to drink until this pain went away, and no one would ever need to know I was there.

Fate wanted to play with me? Bring people I didn't want there, into the game?

So be it.

I'd drag everyone I knew into my little game, and watch as I made my puppets dance.

**Author's Note:**

> So after having played the original P4 and then P4Golden and watched the original animation all in...uh. Very short order... *shifty eyes* I started wondering about Adachi. He's a sociopath, probably yes. High school kids, adults he didn't like, I can entirely imagine him not caring about any of that. But I just wondered what he thought of Nanako's stint on the Channel. So here's my own little head-canon for Adachi during those scenes.
> 
> *now to write the billion other Adachi stories in my head, ughhhh*
> 
> Let me know how you liked it!


End file.
